Career development -

In the words of my typical Scottish mother who was perched at the end of my bed one Monday
morning, soothing my tears as I was panicking yet again about looming deadlines while starting
my own business, (At this point I was running out of money and scared of the impact on my
career if I, in my own words, mess up.)
She help my shoulders and said;
“Put on your big girl pants hen and un-f*ck yourself”.
Startled at the abruptness of her statement, (and more so that my mother actually swore at me)
I felt myself wiping away my tears and sitting up a bit straighter. For the first time, I believed I
could actually do it.

I get you, you may be having a midlife crisis (or a quarter-life in my case), feel like you can’t get
ahead in your career or generally go through your days feeling angry or frustrated. You might
have read numerous self-help books that told you to talk kindly to and love yourself. And at the
end of the day, you’re still in a tough situation and nothing has changed. Except you now have a
loyalty card at Waterstones and you are still no clearer as to who or what a “Goop” is. (FYI it’s a
lifestyle trend built by Gwennyth Paltrow…I think)
Ripping off the band-aid here is the key. Stop the cozy cute self help and jump right in.
Un-f*ck yourself.
Stop saying that you want a better job. Say “I’m getting a better job.”
Want to change careers? Tell yourself, “I’m changing careers.” Language is crucial because you
are what you speak. Switch your negative words to positive ones. For instance, if you always
say, “That’s impossible” or “I can’t,” you will start to feel defeated, frustrated, hopeless and

You always have control over your life even on the worst of days. And you can solve any issue
you come across. Even if you can’t see a solution to a problem, it means you just haven’t
figured it out yet. Keep reinforcing positivity, and you will eventually work out how to solve
whatever it is you are going through.
You might not feel like going to the gym, attending a networking event or asking your boss for a
raise. But screw your feelings. You are not your feelings and thoughts. You are what you do.
Start getting into the mindset of not thinking. Just do it. You don’t have to feel like today is your
day. You just have to act like it. Go out there and grab what you want.

Your feelings are the only thing holding you back. Start living. Start doing. The day you put one
foot in front of the other is the best day of your life. The second is the day you put your word into
action. Stop finding excuses and start finding reasons to do it instead.
It’s only the rest of your life to live. The best investment you will make is in yourself.

By Mollie netwomen ambassador

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